I've realized recently that if you love people enough, and are open enough, you can have a romantic relationship with almost anyone. It doesn't mean you should, though, and it also doesn't meant that, that person is your best match. Be sure to decipher the difference between a person who you have warm feelings toward as a human being, and someone who you have an authentic spark with. This is something to keep in mind as you go about your days in search of a proper mate. I need to remember this, also. Loving people is great, but you have to possess the wherewithal to know the difference between a general love of humanity and that extra punch that a genuine connection packs. Hit me baby one more time.
Blessings,
Lo
Sunday, February 24, 2013
Monday, February 11, 2013
62 Years of Love
My Grandparents were married for 62 years before my Grandpa passed away this past January. I wanted to share a note from my Grandma to my Grandpa on his 70th Birthday. This small bit of writing alone gives me faith that the love we have all dreamed of exits in the world. Read up for inspiration:
Dear Larry My One & Only,
When I met you, I had no idea how much my life was about to be change, but then, how could I have known, a love like ours happens only once in a lifetime. You are a miracle to me, the one I had ever dreamed of, the one I thought only existed in my imagination and when you came into my life, I realized that what I had always thought was happiness, couldn’t compare to the joy loving you brought me. The love we shared has brought us five wonderful children and five beautiful grandchildren* You are a part of everything I think, do and feel and with you by my side I believe that anything is possible.
This birthday gives me a chance to thank you for the miracle of you. You are & always will be the love of my life forever.
Happy Birthday with all my love,
Elida
*Shout out to Robert Jr who came into the picture round 06 to make it six beautiful Grandchildren
Happy Birthday with all my love,
Elida
*Shout out to Robert Jr who came into the picture round 06 to make it six beautiful Grandchildren
And now one from Grandpa-->
From Your Sweetheart Larry
TO ELIDA THE LOVE OF MY LIFE, ON HER 70TH BIRTHDAY
MAY YOU HAVE INFINITELY MORE YEARS TO COME.
You always have given yourself to your family & others. Your love, understanding, time, labor, making drapes, shears, curtains, etc. Baby sitting your Grand children doing for your Family and Other's. We all love You.
I remember the first time I set eyes on you at Harry & Almas where Joe was playing at the time. You came in with Santa & Co. I was with someone else at the time. I was mesmerized with your beauty. It was love at first sight. I knew then I would marry you if you would have me. Proof of that was that I proposed on our second or third date. I always thought love at first sight, was a lot of bull, but believe me, it wasn't.
I might have been the bull, but you were the
Matador. You put the Sword in my heart for life. They used to Call me
the Sicilian Sword, when I was young, but my northern Italian Beauty got
my heart forever. You have given me 5 Wonderful Children and five (6
now) Beautiful GrandChildren. You have given me 46 years of love,
encouragement, friendship, companionship.
You truly are my Love, Best Friend, my Ginger Rogers Dance Partner.
I would be lost without you. I hope and pray that we can dance the Lindy together till we are 100+ years old. I love you with all my heart. P.S. Even when you get after me for my T.V.'s, Pitney Bowes/Insurance supplies and 28 File Cabinets and my procrastination.
I would be lost without you. I hope and pray that we can dance the Lindy together till we are 100+ years old. I love you with all my heart. P.S. Even when you get after me for my T.V.'s, Pitney Bowes/Insurance supplies and 28 File Cabinets and my procrastination.
Love,
Lar The Sicilian Sword :=)
Grandpa, A Life Of Love
Hello Friends,
This is going to be more of a bloggy-blog. I think. I just want to talk about where I’m at. Honesty is key. I want to talk about my Grandpa, mostly.
So life has thrown many twists and turns. My Grandfather passed away and it really put things into perspective for me. I was not prepared for the gravity the loss of one of my primary connections would have on me. I never pictured life without him. He was so strong, I always sort of thought he would just last forever. So I have to say, this event really made me realize, and internalize the fact that everything on this physical plane is temporary. Anything you can touch can be destroyed. But the connections we make, the love we give and the kindness we extend, these things are eternal.
It was truly amazing to see all the incredible connections my Grandpa had made in his life: how many beautiful stories we heard from all the people whose lives he touched just by being who he is. From his Children, to his friends, to the waitresses who served him at his favorite family eatery, everyone had a story about how Lorenzo Ribaudo touched their lives, made them laugh and treated them with kindness and respect. His motto was always, “treat people the way you would like to be treated and God will repay you Tenfold."
So often we scramble from objective to objective trying to achieve as much as we possibly can when it comes to our careers, fitness, status, etc. But the fact is, if we could just focus on our relationships many of our objectives would fall into place anyway, and possibly at an expedited pace.
Take my Grandpa. I am pretty sure his greatest goal in life was to meet and love as many people as he possibly could. He could talk to anyone. He was a man who would say hello to the workers in the sewers (manholes as we call them in Michigan..Is that just a Midwest thing?) when walking down the street. That literally happened. As he walked by them he would shout into the sewers, “Hey guys, how are you doing down there?” It didn’t matter if you were the CEO of a company or a man working underground, my Grandpa wanted to talk to you. He understood that the most important thing we can possibly do on this planet is to connect with each other.
Every success he had came as a result of his personal relationships and the fact that he had a deep, genuine desire to help his fellow human being. He really had his priorities in line. I think I need to remember this more. A lot of times I get down on myself because I feel I have not accomplished enough in my life, but I’ve had a lot of realizations lately and one of them has been that we leave this world with nothing except the love that we gave and received. I think I have done pretty well with this so far, but perhaps have lagged a bit on the love lately, getting wrapped up in the tangible world. I need to get back to people, and everything will come from there. Love for my fellow human being is my number one goal. If I have that, I have all.
All we have are our relationships. Every beautiful thing on this earth has come from a place of deep love and desire to feel more connected to each other, so if we can give into and honor that desire, that is when we will do our best work anyway. Good thought, right?
Something else I’d like to touch on is the way my Grandpa loved my Grandma and vice versa. They were married for 62 years and loved each other through each and every day of it. He always described the first time he saw her as an, “Out of body experience”, and said that he fell in love at first sight. He said he always thought love at first sight was a "bunch of bull", but then he saw my Grandma and changed his mind. He proposed to her on the second date, saying, “from the minute I saw her, I knew I had to marry her, if she’d have me.” I am pretty sure they got married only months after that.
Of course my Grandma was crazy about him too, (I’ll share part of a letter she wrote him for his 70th birthday at the end of this, and in a separate blog post, because it deserves it), they were truly soul mates. It was good to see and remember that true love does happen in the real world. As we go through dating and disappointments, it’s easy to become disillusioned and willing to settle for much less than we’ve dreamed of. Shouldn’t the fact that a love like this exists in real life encourage us to hold out for something greater than what we think possible? It did that for me.
Their love created five children and six Grandchildren. They Built a house together. They Ran and built up their finances together. True love builds and grows, it does not destroy and shrink. It brings you happiness and comfort, not sadness and fear. Even through illness, cognitive issues, and, yes, wobbly times, my Grandparents had all the good parts of love, every moment they were together. Up until the last day my Grandpa would call my Grandma, his, “bride”. Their love was amazingly beautiful, pure and honest.
There are really just so many amazing things about him that I could speak of, but the last one I will comment on here is how he always made people feel special. This is one idea that came up quite often through his funeral, that no matter who my Grandpa was talking to, he always made them feel like they were the special one. I think that is an incredibly important thing to do when interacting with others. It gives into that deeply human desire we all have to be seen, to be heard and to feel valuable. The people in our lives who shape us and make us better people, are incredibly precious gifts and deserve to be treated as such. Grandpa always made sure that everyone he loved knew he loved them. I will carry this lesson deep in my heart and nourish all that I know with the fruits of my knowledge.
Even though the loss of my Grandfather has left a gaping hole in my heart, the encouraging thing is that his legacy gets to live on in us. It’s exciting that his lessons have been understood and that because he taught us well, we will be able to carry on the spiritual riches he attained while on Earth. And being that I am a deeply spiritual person, I feel with every piece of who I am that my Grandpa will continue to find a way to be with us and protect us from a higher, more powerful place than any of us on this Earth could understand.
So this one’s for you, Lorenzo, may you rest in peace, and may your lessons live on in us. I will do everything in my power to make you proud. Love you forever.
Love,
Lauren :=) <-- This is how my Grandpa used to draw smiley faces on the handwritten cards he would give us at holidays and on our birthdays. Two nostrils, very important detail. I’ll miss it.
Part of a note from my Grandma to my Grandpa:
Dear Larry My One & Only,
When I met you, I had no idea how much my life was about to be change, but then, how could I have known, a love like ours happens only once in a lifetime. You are a miracle to me, the one I had ever dreamed of, the one I thought only existed in my imagination and when you came into my life, I realized that what I had always thought was happiness, couldn’t compare to the joy loving you brought me. The love we shared has brought us five wonderful children and five beautiful grandchildren* You are a part of everything I think, do and feel and with you by my side I believe that anything is possible.
*Shout out to Robert Jr who came into the picture round 06 to make it six beautiful Grandchildren
This is going to be more of a bloggy-blog. I think. I just want to talk about where I’m at. Honesty is key. I want to talk about my Grandpa, mostly.
So life has thrown many twists and turns. My Grandfather passed away and it really put things into perspective for me. I was not prepared for the gravity the loss of one of my primary connections would have on me. I never pictured life without him. He was so strong, I always sort of thought he would just last forever. So I have to say, this event really made me realize, and internalize the fact that everything on this physical plane is temporary. Anything you can touch can be destroyed. But the connections we make, the love we give and the kindness we extend, these things are eternal.
It was truly amazing to see all the incredible connections my Grandpa had made in his life: how many beautiful stories we heard from all the people whose lives he touched just by being who he is. From his Children, to his friends, to the waitresses who served him at his favorite family eatery, everyone had a story about how Lorenzo Ribaudo touched their lives, made them laugh and treated them with kindness and respect. His motto was always, “treat people the way you would like to be treated and God will repay you Tenfold."
So often we scramble from objective to objective trying to achieve as much as we possibly can when it comes to our careers, fitness, status, etc. But the fact is, if we could just focus on our relationships many of our objectives would fall into place anyway, and possibly at an expedited pace.
Take my Grandpa. I am pretty sure his greatest goal in life was to meet and love as many people as he possibly could. He could talk to anyone. He was a man who would say hello to the workers in the sewers (manholes as we call them in Michigan..Is that just a Midwest thing?) when walking down the street. That literally happened. As he walked by them he would shout into the sewers, “Hey guys, how are you doing down there?” It didn’t matter if you were the CEO of a company or a man working underground, my Grandpa wanted to talk to you. He understood that the most important thing we can possibly do on this planet is to connect with each other.
Every success he had came as a result of his personal relationships and the fact that he had a deep, genuine desire to help his fellow human being. He really had his priorities in line. I think I need to remember this more. A lot of times I get down on myself because I feel I have not accomplished enough in my life, but I’ve had a lot of realizations lately and one of them has been that we leave this world with nothing except the love that we gave and received. I think I have done pretty well with this so far, but perhaps have lagged a bit on the love lately, getting wrapped up in the tangible world. I need to get back to people, and everything will come from there. Love for my fellow human being is my number one goal. If I have that, I have all.
All we have are our relationships. Every beautiful thing on this earth has come from a place of deep love and desire to feel more connected to each other, so if we can give into and honor that desire, that is when we will do our best work anyway. Good thought, right?
Something else I’d like to touch on is the way my Grandpa loved my Grandma and vice versa. They were married for 62 years and loved each other through each and every day of it. He always described the first time he saw her as an, “Out of body experience”, and said that he fell in love at first sight. He said he always thought love at first sight was a "bunch of bull", but then he saw my Grandma and changed his mind. He proposed to her on the second date, saying, “from the minute I saw her, I knew I had to marry her, if she’d have me.” I am pretty sure they got married only months after that.
Of course my Grandma was crazy about him too, (I’ll share part of a letter she wrote him for his 70th birthday at the end of this, and in a separate blog post, because it deserves it), they were truly soul mates. It was good to see and remember that true love does happen in the real world. As we go through dating and disappointments, it’s easy to become disillusioned and willing to settle for much less than we’ve dreamed of. Shouldn’t the fact that a love like this exists in real life encourage us to hold out for something greater than what we think possible? It did that for me.
Their love created five children and six Grandchildren. They Built a house together. They Ran and built up their finances together. True love builds and grows, it does not destroy and shrink. It brings you happiness and comfort, not sadness and fear. Even through illness, cognitive issues, and, yes, wobbly times, my Grandparents had all the good parts of love, every moment they were together. Up until the last day my Grandpa would call my Grandma, his, “bride”. Their love was amazingly beautiful, pure and honest.
There are really just so many amazing things about him that I could speak of, but the last one I will comment on here is how he always made people feel special. This is one idea that came up quite often through his funeral, that no matter who my Grandpa was talking to, he always made them feel like they were the special one. I think that is an incredibly important thing to do when interacting with others. It gives into that deeply human desire we all have to be seen, to be heard and to feel valuable. The people in our lives who shape us and make us better people, are incredibly precious gifts and deserve to be treated as such. Grandpa always made sure that everyone he loved knew he loved them. I will carry this lesson deep in my heart and nourish all that I know with the fruits of my knowledge.
Even though the loss of my Grandfather has left a gaping hole in my heart, the encouraging thing is that his legacy gets to live on in us. It’s exciting that his lessons have been understood and that because he taught us well, we will be able to carry on the spiritual riches he attained while on Earth. And being that I am a deeply spiritual person, I feel with every piece of who I am that my Grandpa will continue to find a way to be with us and protect us from a higher, more powerful place than any of us on this Earth could understand.
So this one’s for you, Lorenzo, may you rest in peace, and may your lessons live on in us. I will do everything in my power to make you proud. Love you forever.
Love,
Lauren :=) <-- This is how my Grandpa used to draw smiley faces on the handwritten cards he would give us at holidays and on our birthdays. Two nostrils, very important detail. I’ll miss it.
Part of a note from my Grandma to my Grandpa:
Dear Larry My One & Only,
When I met you, I had no idea how much my life was about to be change, but then, how could I have known, a love like ours happens only once in a lifetime. You are a miracle to me, the one I had ever dreamed of, the one I thought only existed in my imagination and when you came into my life, I realized that what I had always thought was happiness, couldn’t compare to the joy loving you brought me. The love we shared has brought us five wonderful children and five beautiful grandchildren* You are a part of everything I think, do and feel and with you by my side I believe that anything is possible.
*Shout out to Robert Jr who came into the picture round 06 to make it six beautiful Grandchildren
Monday, January 7, 2013
A Short Blog About Love
There are certain people in this life who you’ll always love. And it doesn’t mean you’re in love with them. Nor does it mean you’re supposed to be together. It just means that they taught you something--that you gave them a piece of your humanity, and didn’t ask for it back. You weren’t greedy in your love, and neither were they. You may not be able to talk, or at least not talk much due to the nature of the way your relationship ended. And you’ll miss that friendship, but you know that’s the way it’s meant to be. And that’s sad, and that’s hard, but that’s life. And you know that if you saw each other you’d both just be looking in one another’s eyes for the person you used to be when you were together. Over time feelings fade, and people change, but you’re still grateful for what was, grateful for the special bond you had. The point is: True love is never lost. It is never wasted. It's just that it sometimes manifests differently than you expected, and as you grow, you learn that’s okay, too.
Love you.
Lo
Love you.
Lo
Monday, December 31, 2012
2012: A Year Of Lessons; 2013: A Year of Action
2012 was a year full of lessons. I had some accomplishments, but mostly, I learned. I am grateful for those lessons, and I'll tell ya what, I am going to take these lessons and run with them, because God knows it was hard enough to learn them once, I don't want to do it again! 2013 is about enacting the powerful truths I learned through the toils of 2012, so that I can have a more successful and fulfilling life. Sound good? I suggest you do the same! Now I will share some of the most important information I learned this year!
Lesson #1: Honesty is the way:
Only when we are being honest with ourselves and others will we find our way to authenticity, and therefore, happiness. It does not serve our lives or our art to sugar coat our reality. In order to find our way to happiness, we must stay positive, yet, honest. This is a lesson I cherish and will keep with me forever.
Lesson #2 I am an artist:
I know that calling yourself that can sound hoity-toity or asshole-ish, but I want to create, and share my creations, and I have no apologies for that. You shouldn't either. It is a great travesty that it took me 23 years to realize that my eccentric self was screaming to be let out of its cage into some sort of creative achievement. Ever since I have been writing here, writing and performing music, writing comedy, my soul has felt free. I have only just begun! What an exciting Journey!
I spent 23 years trying to fit into the box of Musical theatre and wondering why in the hell it was so hard. BECAUSE MY VOICE IS TOO FULL OF SOUL TO BE CONTAINED BY ANY ONE JASON ROBERT BROWN SONG! It makes so much sense that I have found my voices' full expression in playing and writing music that came from my heart! Shout out to Jordan Leer-I am so grateful for his talent and the fact that we both love music as much as we do! LoJo and The Truth (our Band) is going global in 2013! We are starting a new journey and that's exciting and scary, but I've never felt more strongly about anything in my life.
As for acting, it is still my greatest joy and passion, but I am done with trying to fit into roles the way I think someone wants me to. I am going to bring my unique outlook to it. I've spent too long trying to fit into the box. And also, I am sorry, but if my adoptive mother, Fran Drescher can be a leading lady, then so can I. I will just be an interesting one as opposed to a boring talking stick. You cool with that, Hollywood? I hope so. Because it's happening. In this town "Best friend type" seems to be code for interesting, funny and curvy...Let's change that in 2013 to "Awesome Type". I'm not trying to pretend that cast types don't currently exist in a certain way, but it's my goal while I'm in this town to change the current depiction of them!
Also, Shout out to my girl Casey Shipman-Her and I have some great sketch comedy ideas going and also are starting a weird, awesome and completely US comedy band Called, GrassMan, sure to put out hits that are both disturbing and hilarious in 2013. Check us out! So great to find a fellow kindred spirit who is just as goofy as I am!
Writing is the portal to the soul. When my fingers hit the keyboard or pen hits the paper, I can let out a sigh of relief that whatever was trapped in my heart is no longer in control of me. It feels so great to be able to share what's on my mind and heart and it feels awesome to know that there are so very many of you out there who not only understand what I'm going through, but also, who are on a similar path.
#3 If You Don't Have Your Spirituality, You are going nowhere, especially not down a path of Happiness:
This is my personal thing, not saying it applies to everyone, but the moment I get out of touch with God and my fellow human being, my life goes to shit. Lesson learned. Also your relationship with God, just like any other relationship, is one you have to work on! Do it, LoGrasso!
#4 You Can't Control Anyone But Yourself:
This lesson has been important in dealing with issues with family and friends where I tried to help, but got nothing back. At the time I felt crushed that the people didn't take the advice I had given them, especially since I thought it would better their lives. But it was very egotistical of me to think I knew what was best for them. So I backed off and everyone was happier--sometimes you just need to detach until that person can solve the problem on their own. That's okay, you know? It has to be.
#4.5 It's Okay if Someone Doesn't Like Me:
I am also learning how to be okay with someone not liking me. I find myself to be a rather agreeable person who probably likes people more than the average human being. So when I've been perfectly nice to a person and they don't seem to feel the same way toward me, it's hard to understand. I even had one of my closest friends in LA this year just stop talking to me without any explanation, when I hadn't done anything to them that I knew of. They didn't even respond when I asked them what, if anything, I had done to anger them. It was really hard for me to deal with and I took it pretty personally. But I think their actions say more about them than they do about me. I am learning to let things like this go. This is an on-going lesson, but I'm sure I'll get it! It's hard to love people so much, but it's so very worthwhile in the long-run.
#5 Needless Procrastination is Fear Taking Physical Form:
I have found myself delaying contacting important people, putting off going to auditions or taking classes, procrastinating on cleaning my apartment, etc... All of these things would have taken relatively little energy and most of the pain is in the build up. In 2013 I intend to power through the build up and seize the day!
#5.7 As Nike Tells Us, Just Do It:
This is really a reiteration of #5, but if there's something you want to say, say it, if there's something you want to do, do it, if there's a place you want to be, go there. We often say, there's always tomorrow, but honestly, sometimes there isn't. I don't mean that as darkly as it sounds, but it's just that sometimes the window of opportunity closes more quickly than we would like it to. If you see something you want staring you in the face, grab it...Too often we tie our own hands and let our fate pass us by! The truth is if we don't do something now we might lose the chance to do it, ever. I am over the build up, I just want to go for it! 2013, a year of action and achievement, let's go!
#6 In Conclusion:
Though over all this year has been full of ups and downs, for me, and, I know, for many of you out there: the hardships we faced will not go to waste if we take those lessons and turn them into power! Let's be our best selves this year and achieve everything we set our minds to and even more!
I believe in you and me!
LET'S GO!
<3 Lo!
Lesson #1: Honesty is the way:
Only when we are being honest with ourselves and others will we find our way to authenticity, and therefore, happiness. It does not serve our lives or our art to sugar coat our reality. In order to find our way to happiness, we must stay positive, yet, honest. This is a lesson I cherish and will keep with me forever.
Lesson #2 I am an artist:
I know that calling yourself that can sound hoity-toity or asshole-ish, but I want to create, and share my creations, and I have no apologies for that. You shouldn't either. It is a great travesty that it took me 23 years to realize that my eccentric self was screaming to be let out of its cage into some sort of creative achievement. Ever since I have been writing here, writing and performing music, writing comedy, my soul has felt free. I have only just begun! What an exciting Journey!
I spent 23 years trying to fit into the box of Musical theatre and wondering why in the hell it was so hard. BECAUSE MY VOICE IS TOO FULL OF SOUL TO BE CONTAINED BY ANY ONE JASON ROBERT BROWN SONG! It makes so much sense that I have found my voices' full expression in playing and writing music that came from my heart! Shout out to Jordan Leer-I am so grateful for his talent and the fact that we both love music as much as we do! LoJo and The Truth (our Band) is going global in 2013! We are starting a new journey and that's exciting and scary, but I've never felt more strongly about anything in my life.
As for acting, it is still my greatest joy and passion, but I am done with trying to fit into roles the way I think someone wants me to. I am going to bring my unique outlook to it. I've spent too long trying to fit into the box. And also, I am sorry, but if my adoptive mother, Fran Drescher can be a leading lady, then so can I. I will just be an interesting one as opposed to a boring talking stick. You cool with that, Hollywood? I hope so. Because it's happening. In this town "Best friend type" seems to be code for interesting, funny and curvy...Let's change that in 2013 to "Awesome Type". I'm not trying to pretend that cast types don't currently exist in a certain way, but it's my goal while I'm in this town to change the current depiction of them!
Also, Shout out to my girl Casey Shipman-Her and I have some great sketch comedy ideas going and also are starting a weird, awesome and completely US comedy band Called, GrassMan, sure to put out hits that are both disturbing and hilarious in 2013. Check us out! So great to find a fellow kindred spirit who is just as goofy as I am!
Writing is the portal to the soul. When my fingers hit the keyboard or pen hits the paper, I can let out a sigh of relief that whatever was trapped in my heart is no longer in control of me. It feels so great to be able to share what's on my mind and heart and it feels awesome to know that there are so very many of you out there who not only understand what I'm going through, but also, who are on a similar path.
#3 If You Don't Have Your Spirituality, You are going nowhere, especially not down a path of Happiness:
This is my personal thing, not saying it applies to everyone, but the moment I get out of touch with God and my fellow human being, my life goes to shit. Lesson learned. Also your relationship with God, just like any other relationship, is one you have to work on! Do it, LoGrasso!
#4 You Can't Control Anyone But Yourself:
This lesson has been important in dealing with issues with family and friends where I tried to help, but got nothing back. At the time I felt crushed that the people didn't take the advice I had given them, especially since I thought it would better their lives. But it was very egotistical of me to think I knew what was best for them. So I backed off and everyone was happier--sometimes you just need to detach until that person can solve the problem on their own. That's okay, you know? It has to be.
#4.5 It's Okay if Someone Doesn't Like Me:
I am also learning how to be okay with someone not liking me. I find myself to be a rather agreeable person who probably likes people more than the average human being. So when I've been perfectly nice to a person and they don't seem to feel the same way toward me, it's hard to understand. I even had one of my closest friends in LA this year just stop talking to me without any explanation, when I hadn't done anything to them that I knew of. They didn't even respond when I asked them what, if anything, I had done to anger them. It was really hard for me to deal with and I took it pretty personally. But I think their actions say more about them than they do about me. I am learning to let things like this go. This is an on-going lesson, but I'm sure I'll get it! It's hard to love people so much, but it's so very worthwhile in the long-run.
#5 Needless Procrastination is Fear Taking Physical Form:
I have found myself delaying contacting important people, putting off going to auditions or taking classes, procrastinating on cleaning my apartment, etc... All of these things would have taken relatively little energy and most of the pain is in the build up. In 2013 I intend to power through the build up and seize the day!
#5.7 As Nike Tells Us, Just Do It:
This is really a reiteration of #5, but if there's something you want to say, say it, if there's something you want to do, do it, if there's a place you want to be, go there. We often say, there's always tomorrow, but honestly, sometimes there isn't. I don't mean that as darkly as it sounds, but it's just that sometimes the window of opportunity closes more quickly than we would like it to. If you see something you want staring you in the face, grab it...Too often we tie our own hands and let our fate pass us by! The truth is if we don't do something now we might lose the chance to do it, ever. I am over the build up, I just want to go for it! 2013, a year of action and achievement, let's go!
#6 In Conclusion:
Though over all this year has been full of ups and downs, for me, and, I know, for many of you out there: the hardships we faced will not go to waste if we take those lessons and turn them into power! Let's be our best selves this year and achieve everything we set our minds to and even more!
I believe in you and me!
LET'S GO!
<3 Lo!
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
The Importance of Acknowledging Darkness
It is a blessing to have a positive outlook, if, and only if, coupled with that you are honest about the emotional state you are in.
I am here to admit something, folks. I’m a positiveaholic. Admitting it is the first step, or so I’m told. In college I learned about something called the “Pollyanna Effect”. The Pollyanna effect, Based off the popular anime cartoon, The Story of Pollyanna, a Girl of Love, is the habit of taking the all occurrences in one’s life and spinning them into something positive.
Now, don’t get me wrong, I am very grateful to be able to see the light in any situation, but never acknowledging darkness can be just as disastrous as an inability to see light.*
In an attempt to be more honest in my life and my work, I am going to share something with you: It has been a tough couple of months. A couple of months filled with confusion, relationship shifts, a car accident, family trauma and on top of that, trying to be a functioning and successful human. It hasn’t been easy, but I’ve managed.
Now in my life, I have, or at least have worked very hard to be, a positive person who brings light and love to the world. It is my belief that every soul has a different intention and I really believe mine is to bring the aforementioned light and love. Everything stems from there: every lesson, every vocation, every relationship. Including the difficult things I have to deal with. A lot of the problems I face are more difficult because I have built a life based upon love: so when the world meets me with a cruel situation, my first instinct is to turn it around and spin it into one of love. Sometimes I’m right, but sometimes it’s wildly contrived and wrong.
I am coming to understand, that this unyielding positive outlook isn’t always a good thing. It does a soul no good to pretend that the bad things you are experiencing aren’t actually happening. On top of making you feel crazy, you are unable to learn, which is our number one goal while in these physical bodies. If you can’t learn, then you can’t grow, which will ultimately inhibit you from being your best self and giving and receiving the purest forms of love. This is because when you close yourself off to what you deem to be negative emotions and situations, by default, this blockage carries over to the positive emotions and situations. So you are really only living a half life. Half lives should only exist in chemistry, and even then, it’s debatable.
Even though I have been trying with all my might to love with the strength and fervor I know I am capable of, I haven’t been able to because I have not been allowing myself to feel the pain that I needed to feel. My new goal is to accept, acknowledge and deal with any and all emotions and situations in my life. Not to judge, deny or control, because these verbs always lead to trouble. I will let life’s unpleasant situations play out, I will acknowledge them, without dwelling on them, and learn from them. I will not forget what got me to the place where I felt that way. I will take the lesson of out it, and I will move on with the peace of mind that I don’t have to experience the same thing again if I make different choices, or, if I do end up in that situation, I’ll know how to deal with it more effectively. Then, I believe, I will experience real-life positivity. I will have a positive outlook with a foundation that makes sense, rather than something that is falsified because that’s how it’s “supposed” to be.
I always want to be an optimist, but I think I will be a stronger optimist once I am able to accurately define how I feel and learn from it without having to shield myself or the world from my true emotional life. It will be honest optimism, not optimism masking pain, which is just bullshit. If there’s one thing the world doesn’t need, it’s another liar, so I am vowing to be more honest with myself and with you.
Also, it took a lot of courage to write this down and now to share it, so I am proud of myself. This realization is a huge stride on my slow, yet steady, marathon to self actualization.
Thank you for reading. I hope you can support me on this journey, and know I support you on your path to self, wherever you may be.
Sending you love and light,
Lolo <3
*I decided to bold/italicize the things that I really need to remember, and that might be helpful to you, also :-)
I am here to admit something, folks. I’m a positiveaholic. Admitting it is the first step, or so I’m told. In college I learned about something called the “Pollyanna Effect”. The Pollyanna effect, Based off the popular anime cartoon, The Story of Pollyanna, a Girl of Love, is the habit of taking the all occurrences in one’s life and spinning them into something positive.
Now, don’t get me wrong, I am very grateful to be able to see the light in any situation, but never acknowledging darkness can be just as disastrous as an inability to see light.*
In an attempt to be more honest in my life and my work, I am going to share something with you: It has been a tough couple of months. A couple of months filled with confusion, relationship shifts, a car accident, family trauma and on top of that, trying to be a functioning and successful human. It hasn’t been easy, but I’ve managed.
Now in my life, I have, or at least have worked very hard to be, a positive person who brings light and love to the world. It is my belief that every soul has a different intention and I really believe mine is to bring the aforementioned light and love. Everything stems from there: every lesson, every vocation, every relationship. Including the difficult things I have to deal with. A lot of the problems I face are more difficult because I have built a life based upon love: so when the world meets me with a cruel situation, my first instinct is to turn it around and spin it into one of love. Sometimes I’m right, but sometimes it’s wildly contrived and wrong.
I am coming to understand, that this unyielding positive outlook isn’t always a good thing. It does a soul no good to pretend that the bad things you are experiencing aren’t actually happening. On top of making you feel crazy, you are unable to learn, which is our number one goal while in these physical bodies. If you can’t learn, then you can’t grow, which will ultimately inhibit you from being your best self and giving and receiving the purest forms of love. This is because when you close yourself off to what you deem to be negative emotions and situations, by default, this blockage carries over to the positive emotions and situations. So you are really only living a half life. Half lives should only exist in chemistry, and even then, it’s debatable.
Even though I have been trying with all my might to love with the strength and fervor I know I am capable of, I haven’t been able to because I have not been allowing myself to feel the pain that I needed to feel. My new goal is to accept, acknowledge and deal with any and all emotions and situations in my life. Not to judge, deny or control, because these verbs always lead to trouble. I will let life’s unpleasant situations play out, I will acknowledge them, without dwelling on them, and learn from them. I will not forget what got me to the place where I felt that way. I will take the lesson of out it, and I will move on with the peace of mind that I don’t have to experience the same thing again if I make different choices, or, if I do end up in that situation, I’ll know how to deal with it more effectively. Then, I believe, I will experience real-life positivity. I will have a positive outlook with a foundation that makes sense, rather than something that is falsified because that’s how it’s “supposed” to be.
I always want to be an optimist, but I think I will be a stronger optimist once I am able to accurately define how I feel and learn from it without having to shield myself or the world from my true emotional life. It will be honest optimism, not optimism masking pain, which is just bullshit. If there’s one thing the world doesn’t need, it’s another liar, so I am vowing to be more honest with myself and with you.
Also, it took a lot of courage to write this down and now to share it, so I am proud of myself. This realization is a huge stride on my slow, yet steady, marathon to self actualization.
Thank you for reading. I hope you can support me on this journey, and know I support you on your path to self, wherever you may be.
Sending you love and light,
Lolo <3
*I decided to bold/italicize the things that I really need to remember, and that might be helpful to you, also :-)
Wednesday, November 28, 2012
I Believe The World Is Getting Kinder
People always talk about how the current generation of the
country will be the end of the world as we know it, but I think for the fist
time in a long time, people are wrong.
Though, maybe it’s not the first time in a long time? It
seems we’ve always been building up to how we are today, which means people
have been getting increasingly better as the years go on. Each generation has
been inching toward acknowledging a need for shared rights between all people.
If anything, I think this country (and the world, at large) is
getting kinder—or at the very least, conscious. It seems we are at least aware
of the turmoil that surrounds us, and the impact our choices have on each other
and our planet. The increase in human rights we’ve seen over the past one
hundred years is proof, alone, that we are starting to become less egotistical:
that we’re becoming more concerned with the happiness of our fellow human being
than our own power.
The strides we’ve taken and continue to take for civil
rights, women’s rights and gay rights are all very encouraging to me. These
strides have taken a total reconstruction of the common thought and a hell of a
lot of courage. The lawmakers and citizens who have fought for them needed to
put themselves and their reputation as, “well-thought-of individuals”, on the
line in order to do what was right. That, my friends, is what I like to call:
gutsy kindness. Can’t get enough of that stuff!
Wonderfully enough, it doesn’t stop with these particular human
rights. There are kindness ambassadors springing up everywhere for many
different causes! I am very encouraged by the different sorts of activism I’ve
noticed taking off around the country and beyond. From veganism and
vegetarianism, to fighting against animal cruelty, to environmental groups, to
veteran support, to serving the poor and homeless…The list goes on and on. Needless-to-say:
I am constantly inspired and in awe of the giving hearts of my fellow people.
Even in cases such as Kony 2012, which, from what I
understand, turned out to be a bit of a sham, I can say I am proud of the fact
that so many people felt so inspired to speak out for their sisters and
brothers in different countries who are suffering. I feel that people are
starting to understand the most important piece of the puzzle in our human
experience: That we are all only mirrors of each other and that only love is
real. When you hurt, I hurt, and vice versa. This makes me believe the levels
of empathy and perspective taking are increasing, as well, which, are key
factors to people dolling out kindness with such generosity.
So call me a cockeyed optimist! Call me a fool. Just don’t
call me Sally. I’m kidding. Call me Sally the most. But honestly, as much it
can be easy to get discouraged by certain experiences in life, when I think of
all the good and all the beauty there is in the world, it brings me to tears and
propels me to move forward with an open heart. We are so lucky to live in a
time when there is so much love, generosity and benevolence everywhere we look!
Maybe I’m a hippie, or maybe I’m just aware. You can decide
what you think of me, if you care to judge. But I think it’s pretty inarguable
that for a country that began with bringing a group of people here by force and
enslaving them, while running a simultaneous genocide of the native people of
this land, and basically keeping any person who wasn’t a white male away from any
real rights, we have come a LONG way. I am proud. Go America! Go World! I can
say from experience, it’s a lot less exhausting and far more inspiring to be
aware of and grateful for all the good in the world. It makes one feel alive!
I appreciate the kindness today and am excited to see what
tomorrow brings!
Sending you love,
Lo
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