I Believe The World Is Getting Kinder

People always talk about how the current generation of the country will be the end of the world as we know it, but I think for the fist time in a long time, people are wrong.

Though, maybe it’s not the first time in a long time? It seems we’ve always been building up to how we are today, which means people have been getting increasingly better as the years go on. Each generation has been inching toward acknowledging a need for shared rights between all people.

If anything, I think this country (and the world, at large) is getting kinder—or at the very least, conscious. It seems we are at least aware of the turmoil that surrounds us, and the impact our choices have on each other and our planet. The increase in human rights we’ve seen over the past one hundred years is proof, alone, that we are starting to become less egotistical: that we’re becoming more concerned with the happiness of our fellow human being than our own power.

The strides we’ve taken and continue to take for civil rights, women’s rights and gay rights are all very encouraging to me. These strides have taken a total reconstruction of the common thought and a hell of a lot of courage. The lawmakers and citizens who have fought for them needed to put themselves and their reputation as, “well-thought-of individuals”, on the line in order to do what was right. That, my friends, is what I like to call: gutsy kindness. Can’t get enough of that stuff!

Wonderfully enough, it doesn’t stop with these particular human rights. There are kindness ambassadors springing up everywhere for many different causes! I am very encouraged by the different sorts of activism I’ve noticed taking off around the country and beyond. From veganism and vegetarianism, to fighting against animal cruelty, to environmental groups, to veteran support, to serving the poor and homeless…The list goes on and on. Needless-to-say: I am constantly inspired and in awe of the giving hearts of my fellow people.

Even in cases such as Kony 2012, which, from what I understand, turned out to be a bit of a sham, I can say I am proud of the fact that so many people felt so inspired to speak out for their sisters and brothers in different countries who are suffering. I feel that people are starting to understand the most important piece of the puzzle in our human experience: That we are all only mirrors of each other and that only love is real. When you hurt, I hurt, and vice versa. This makes me believe the levels of empathy and perspective taking are increasing, as well, which, are key factors to people dolling out kindness with such generosity.

So call me a cockeyed optimist! Call me a fool. Just don’t call me Sally. I’m kidding. Call me Sally the most. But honestly, as much it can be easy to get discouraged by certain experiences in life, when I think of all the good and all the beauty there is in the world, it brings me to tears and propels me to move forward with an open heart. We are so lucky to live in a time when there is so much love, generosity and benevolence everywhere we look!

Maybe I’m a hippie, or maybe I’m just aware. You can decide what you think of me, if you care to judge. But I think it’s pretty inarguable that for a country that began with bringing a group of people here by force and enslaving them, while running a simultaneous genocide of the native people of this land, and basically keeping any person who wasn’t a white male away from any real rights, we have come a LONG way. I am proud. Go America! Go World! I can say from experience, it’s a lot less exhausting and far more inspiring to be aware of and grateful for all the good in the world. It makes one feel alive!

I appreciate the kindness today and am excited to see what tomorrow brings!

Sending you love,

Lo

Have Gratitude Now: It's The Little Things

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So this is slightly belated, but:

Happy Gratitude Day! What are you thankful for? Personally, I am most thankful for all the love in the Universe and for the ability to learn. I am Thankful for everything that has ever happened to me and everything that ever will. With each life event we have the opportunity to learn, grow and make our lives and the way we love more successful. I feel I have done this and I pray I will have the courage to continue to do so.

I am so thankful for all the people I’ve met on life’s path; for those who have faded away, those who have stuck around and for those who are yet to come: you are the loves of my life and I am extremely lucky to know or to have known you. Even when someone first seemed to be more of a nuisance than a blessing, I can honestly say every person I’ve ever met has taught me something and/or challenged me to find a deeper way to love. Thank you: I love you.

Of course, with that being said, I am most thankful for the people in my inner circle: my friends and family mean the world to me and I feel so blessed to have so many beautiful souls in my life.

I am grateful that I am unique and unwilling to compromise on who I am. I know there have been times in my life that have been more difficult due to my quirky soul, but I also know that being the person I am has helped others become comfortable with being their weird selves. I am thankful for this and very proud to be a goof. If you ever hide who you are, you are cheating the world from seeing your unique light. That's not fair to us. Shine on, babies, shine on.

I am thankful to love so much and so deeply. Though at times this, too, has made my life more challenging, it has also made it more rewarding. I know that whatever I goal I go toward in life, I’ll work to achieve it with the whole of my soul. I am glad that while I’m in this physical body, I’m getting as much out of life as I can! Similarly, I am thankful to have so much that I’m passionate about. I am grateful to love and be a part of art. I am glad that I dedicated my life to the arts at such a young age and that I've stuck with it through thick and thin.  I am thankful for my instincts, perseverance and belief in the power of a dream.

And, of course, I am thankful for my health, and the fact that I have all the materials I need to survive on a physical level. It is so easy to get down on ourselves for not having what we deem to be the perfect body, a stunning wardrobe, or the most gourmet food and drinks, however, we must focus on what we do have. I would like to thank my legs for carrying me around, my arms for conducting tasks big and small, and my face for the ability to smile through all of life's trials and tribulations. I am thankful that I have clothing, shelter and sustenance. Even small things cannot be taken for granted. Let us not wait until we lose something to appreciate the many blessings in our life. Have. Gratitude. Now.

Finally, I am thankful for you. I appreciate you: whoever and wherever you are. I am truly grateful that you are taking the time to read what's on my mind and track my path road to success. Know that wherever you are, I am sending you love and wishing that you attain the courage to achieve your dreams. I believe in you.

In love and Thanks,

Lo :-)

There is more power in promoting something you love than ridiculing something you hate

This blog might be brief because it is a simple thought, yet, it is so important.

In the wake of the election, and just a time, in general, when we are polarized on so many issues, remember: it is a more efficient use of your time to promote something you believe in than to fight against something you despise.

I need to remember this as much as anyone. I am certainly guilty of brining attention to issues and candidates I disagree with. When most of us see something that we don't like it is our first instinct to say that it is bad and why we think it is bad. This isn't very constructive, is it? Rather than giving energy to a negative thought and a force you find to be incongruous with your life thesis, why not bring energy and positivity to something that gives you hope and lines up with your beliefs?

Good thoughts attract more good thoughts, as bad attract bad. The more energy you give to fear and hate, the more prevalent they become in the world.

So in these last days before the election, for every time you feel compelled to say why you hate one candidate or another, try to think of the opposite, positive attribute you like in the opponent and state that instead. It might make this whole battle a little less bloody and a little kinder. For as we know, if there's one thing politics isn't lacking, it's negativity. Why add to that? Let's annul it. How?? As always, focus on the love.

Love,

Lo

Women's Rights And Voting This Election

Something sprung me into action today, folks. I'm usually not one to get too political, wishing to respect every person’s viewpoint, and, as always, I do, but something needs to be said, and more importantly: Something needs to be done. 


Today I was when I working at my yoga studio as a Zen Ambassador (front desk receptionist, but as a PR lady, I know how to spin things), one of our students had a pin on that I'll post below. It said, "We will do it again! Obama Biden" and had a picture of Rosie the Riveter on it. I happen to be supporting Obama in this election, and I have always supported Rosie the Riveter, so I commented that I loved her pin. 

With that, she said the pin was mine. Generous dame, she was. I was then commenting on how important it is to vote in general, thinking of the women who were killed, imprisoned, beaten and starved in order to get us the right. This is huge; so if there's anything you take from this, ladies, even if you disagree with my personal viewpoint, please vote! Just do it. Don't disrespect the women who came before us, it's a slap in the face to the trauma they endured to get us the right to waltz right up and mark up that ballot. DO IT!


So back to the story: we then spoke about the Lily Ledbetter Equal Pay Act and how absurd it is that someone could object to a law that would make our female citizens stand on equal ground with our male citizens. Then she said something to me that really shook me up and I'm paraphrasing here, I guarantee you whatever she said had much more power, but here goes:

"I'm 75 and I thought after we fought so hard in the 60s and 70s this battle was over. I never thought I'd have to fight again, but in the last year there has been some of the most sexist material and propaganda (speech, literature and laws) that I've seen in my whole life. We have to keep on fighting"

WOW. This was shocking to hear. In my gender communication class we spoke about the backlash that occurs after a minority group gains power: could we now be experiencing a backlash 30-40 years in the making?

Is this happening now because we allowed ourselves to forget? We allowed ourselves to stop fighting, thinking what we had was good enough? I, for one, am not satisfied with making significantly less than my male coworkers; but what have I honestly done to fight this besides being a good employee? Nothing. Working hard is not enough, we have to take to the streets and remind people that we are worthy of TRUE and LITERAL equal status when it comes to the dolla dollar bills (yallz) and all things.

I have wanted to fight for women's rights since high school and looked up some organizations once or twice, but put it off, declaring I was too busy. Well, no more. We cannot put off being equal citizens any longer. This is serious. When there is a candidate who will unabashedly denounce the right to equal pay for women, coverage on birth control, the right to choose, the Affordable Care Act, which requires insurance coverage for preventive services like mammograms& cancer screenings, and more, I cannot abide.

Some of these issues are the very reason women were able to rise up. Did you know there was a direct correlation between the advent and use of the birth control pill and women's prominence in the workplace? When we can control our reproductive system, we can control our professional lives. How can we support someone or something that wants to take this away? Because here’s the issue when it comes to someone being against a woman’s right to reproductive control: all the signs point to root of the desire being to take away power and clout from the female population. That’s a sizable issue in my book. The book of Lo.

We’re all entitled to our personal views on birth control. I personally am against abortion. I couldn’t do it except in an extreme situation. But I think that it is a choice every woman should have a right to make on her own, since the fetus is technically a part of her body until it comes out. It’s also about the fact a government that should not be able to control a person’s body. That is not their place.

Back to the cause of women’s rights: I stand by my usual tenants of love and peace. Of course everything will be done with love and with the hope to make a more loving, fair and peaceful planet. I have no anger in my soul, only a passion for justice, and a deep, unconditional love for people and for equal rights. Everyone should be able to start out on equal footing regardless of race, gender, religion or any other characteristic that we delude ourselves into thinking separates us.

Of course, it doesn't stop with women's rights. There are many other things to fight for. This includes, but is not limited to: Gay Rights, Minority Race Rights, taking care of the poor, Health Care, cleaning up our food, taking the chemicals out of household products, and so many other things that I truly believe will make a kinder country and make us more able to help other countries. If we heal the hurt within this nation's walls (holler to Hawaii and Alaska, also- we love you kids and we didn't forget about you just because you're not technically in our walls!), just think of the kind of help we can offer other Nations.

I think with the current state of the Nation, it starts with voting for candidates that support laws that produce compassionate results: whether it is the Lily Ledbetter Fair Pay Act or anything else, just think about what a candidate saying yes or no to these laws says about them as a human being, and then think about whether or not you would want them ruling your country.

I hear people say, "bleeding heart liberals" a lot. But shouldn't our hearts be bleeding? I know I've been alive a relatively short period of time, but I know enough about the world to know it's in a state of disarray and has been for a while. There is enough pain and suffering going on right now that everyone I know is going through something no matter how tiny or how large. This goes beyond politics and into the need and outcry for more compassion in the world. I think the Democratic Party is doing a better job at this right now, but I am not saying that Democrats are infallible. In fact, I voted for a couple of Republicans (GASP!) based on their personal viewpoint and issues, so I am still open to everything and attached to nothing.

Back to the point: I’m not thrilled with everything Obama does--in a perfect world we wouldn't need parties, we would just do what's right. But as far as doing what's best for a majority of Americans (AND HELLO: WOMEN ARE A MAJORITY- 50.8% according to the 2011 USA Quick Facts from the Census Bureau) I think that at this juncture, he is doing a much better job. It is just unthinkable to me that as a sensible human being you'd allow yourself to vote for someone who would purposely take away basic rights from your daughter, wife, sister, friend or lover.

Think about it. 

                                                              Here’s the Pin:

Love,

Lolo

The Catcher in the Rye

There's so much going on in my life right now and so many life lessons coming at me all at once, I am having a hard time deciding which one to process first and write down for the eyes of all the web to see. So I decided, when in doubt, do nothing. At least until later tonight...and instead, I have chosen to share a quote with you from my Favorite book of all time: The Catcher in the Rye by JD Salinger:

"Anyway, I keep picturing all these little kids playing some game in this big field of rye and all. Thousands of little kids, and nobody's around - nobody big, I mean - except me. And I'm standing on the edge of some crazy cliff. What I have to do, I have to catch everybody if they start to go over the cliff - I mean if they're running and they don't look where they're going I have to come out from somewhere and catch them. That's all I do all day. I'd just be the catcher in the rye and all. I know it's crazy, but that's the only thing I'd really like to be."
- J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye, Ch. 22

Sometimes I really think that is all I want too. Just to be there to save people from falling and help back on their feet. I wish you could get paid to do that. Maybe you can?

More to come.

Love,

Lo

Love Your Enemies

I feel the big G.O.D. has been sending a lot of excellent lessons into my life disguised as challenging people. And while I truly appreciate the opportunity to expand my soul’s spiritual knowledge to such a high degree, mustering love in a situation when a person seems to be purposely acting annoying or cruel can be hard, but I know it is ultimately rewarding. Therefore, I’ve been pondering the best way to find the love in the eyes of people who seem to be completely alien, but who I know, in reality, are just an extension of my soul and every soul on this planet.

Obviously this type of love is amongst the hardest to access. It can also be the most rewarding, because your love can inspire the same in the soul of the person you are challenged by. Therefore increasing the level of understanding, positivity, and elevated thought in the world. While it is difficult, it is something I have worked toward and managed to maintain several times in my life, so I know I can do it again.

One person I’m working toward this with now is my downstairs, stage Mom, neighbor who keeps coming up and knocking on my door because she thinks I’m walking too loudly, amongst other seemingly ridiculous complaints. While when she yells like a manic psycho (which, I shouldn’t even be saying, because I’m trying to increase the love, but I’m human so I need to get in a little jab before I heal the wound), I’m tempted to start calling her names and classify her as bad, I know, deep down, that this will not get me anywhere. The only way to counteract her feelings of anger, possible hate and frustration are with feelings and actions of understanding, peace and support.

Dealing with this type of person is good because it tests one’s love for humanity: once the initial annoyance or desire to hate is trumped by compassion and love for these difficult people, you are much more able to love all people in your life. If you can muster compassion and empathy for someone who seems to be intentionally making your life harder, just think of how well we can love those who work to make our lives better.

So a good method to find your way to love is to remember that we are only reflections of one another. When we have problems with another human being, regardless of severity, it is worthy to ask what it reflects in us that we detest a part of another human so much. Why is what they are doing so upsetting? Is it because we are truly doing something wrong? What is going on in their life that they felt the need to act that way and how can I be more compassionate? Etc.

 Rarely do we question our reactions to the people in our lives; even as mature adults, it is fairly common to be ego-centric, so it is much easier to simply qualify other's actions negatively. However, sometimes if we simply examine ourselves we realize that the problem we held with that person was merely in our reaction, not their action.

Another thought to contemplate is the fact that you’ve probably made a person feel the way they are making you feel now at some point or another in your life. So you can either think back to that time when you may have done so, or engage in perspective taking to ponder why they might be acting the way they are. You could even ask them what is going on in their life and how you may have provoked them to act this way. Either way, once you recall or imagine it is easier not to hate, as you either have been, or could one day be in their shoes.

And if you are really having trouble seeing from their point of view, just remember that calling someone mean doesn’t make them nicer and sending someone hate doesn’t get you love. It is merely wasted energy. And since love breeds love, it is better to put that out there.

Here are my views. Take em or leave em. I’m still working out the details, but this is the outline. Feel free to express whatever tips you may have for me and my downstairs neighbs/any and all people like this in your life. Leave questions, too. Let’s make this a dialogue.

I leave you with this quote by Dr. Brian Weiss:

“I think that at the highest level all souls are connected. It is our illusion or grand delusion that we are individuated, or separate.”

^That explains it nicely, I think.

Love,

LO

You can mistake a streetlamp for the moon based on perspective

Many times in my life I have viewed something that was seemingly mundane which later snowballed into a perfect metaphor for one of life’s questions that I had been pondering.

So get ready, because you’re about to get hit with a story like that, kids. Also, be warned because this blog gets kind of personal, but I figure, if I can’t share my own life with people, what kind of blogger am I? I want people to learn from my mistakes!

Anyhow, two days ago I was on my way home from play rehearsal when my travel was halted by a Stoplight. It was in this moment that I saw it: the most beautiful and beaming full moon there had been in weeks. It looked different from any moon I had ever seen; it was inspiring to say the least. Upon further examination of this perfect specimen, I realized I was not, in fact, looking at the moon, but rather, at the brilliant, beaming…light from a streetlamp.

Besides thinking that maybe I should start wearing my glasses while driving, another interesting thought hit my mind: You can mistake a streetlamp for the moon based on perspective. Because of where I was looking, at first glance, it really did seem to be the celestial figure every human has gazed upon since the beginning of time. However, upon further investigation, it was just like every other lamp on the block.

Now, this metaphor makes sense for a couple of reasons, but it made me think mostly about love. Why, you may ask? So glad you did: I have been noticing a lot of people getting divorced lately, and, conversely, a lot of people my age getting engaged and married. I think about marriage and it feels so far off to me. Perhaps that is because I can’t imagine marrying someone who didn’t truly feel like my other half, who wasn’t the moon to my earth and vice versa. It’s not only hard to conceive that you could meet that person at such a young age, but also, that you would feel the desire to get married so young. Though, I know, it DOES happen and for a few people, it makes perfect sense.

With that being said, here’s a problem I’ve noticed: I think a lot of people marry someone who they thought (or, more closely, hoped) was their moon, but in reality, was merely a street lamp.

That’s not to say that they weren’t a grade A street lamp with an amazing bulb that brought light and joy to their partner’s life, but eventually every bulb burns out, or at the very least, flickers heavily. Nobody needs a weak strobe light kind of love.

And hey! This blog is supposed to be about the wobbly Twenties, so let’s speak about it: Don’t waste your twenties (nor, any part of your life) dating the wrong person. Live passionately and with a daring panache. Move through your life, toward your dreams, swiftly and confidently. Date along the way and if you find someone you feel to be worthy of slowing down for, or better yet, running with, and if they feel the same way about you, do it! But certainly don’t do something because it’s safe, In life or in love. As my teacher Christina said once or twice in her acting class, “Safe is boring.” And Xtina was right. Risk takers are the ones with all the stories. Gamble on holding out for a love that’s worth risking it all for.

It comes down to this: Do your partner and you have a similar thesis to your life? Do you have similarities where it counts? If the answer is no, reconsider. You don’t have to be the same person by any means, in fact, it is great to date different people because you learn from them, but if you do not agree on the fundamentals, then it will never work long-term.

Many people end up marrying for the sake of marriage, not because they found a love that felt like home. For example, I recently left (on mutual terms) a five-month relationship that was over-all quite lovely and with a great guy. Now you may be saying in your head, ‘But why would you do that, it sounds like you had it good..blah blah blah..” Before you go into that, let it be known that this man and I had some deep rooted beliefs and needs that were quite divergent, unfaltering and non-negotiable. Too many people end up marrying the people that they should have dated for five months, had an amazing time with, learned a ton with and moved on from. Why do they do this? Either they are completely delusional or, more likely, because they are afraid of being alone. DON’T DO THIS.

I can tell you from experience, you can feel much lonelier with someone than without someone. I can only imagine that this is even more true in marriage; remember, we’re talking about ETERNITY here, folks. It’s not a game. It’s not about planning a fun party. It’s about finding someone you want to spend the rest of your life with. That’s a beautiful thing, that should not be rushed or forced with the wrong person, but rather, gently danced through with the right one. 

Don’t settle for a streetlamp when your moon is out there walking around waiting for you to stop getting diverted by the closer, easier-to-reach light fixtures and to suck it up and take a giant leap for man kind. Or at least, love kind. Which is man kind. I wish he had said human kind. It’s more inclusive. RIP Neil Armstrong. Tangent.

Long Story Short: To quote my friend Hannah, do not accept anything less than your ideal destiny. Love doesn’t have to be perfect, but it does have to feel like home.

And though Shakespeare Claimed the moon was “inconstant” I beg to differ. Even when we can’t see it, or when it takes a different form, it’s always there. Kind of like love. Best. Metaphor. EVER. Goodnight.